The Gottman Method was developed by Drs. John and Julie Gottman and combines more than 40 years of couples research and clinical practice. As summarized by the Gottman Institue, the Gottman Method is a goal-oriented and scientifically based method of therapy that uses research-based interventions and exercises to help couples break through barriers in an effort to achieve greater understanding, connection and intimacy.
The Gottman Theory For Making Relationships Work
Build Love Maps
How well do you know your partner’s inner psychological world, his or her history, worries, stresses, joys, and hopes?
Share Fondness and Admiration
The antidote for contempt, this level focuses on the amount of affection and respect within a relationship. (To strengthen fondness and admiration, express appreciation and respect.)
Turn Towards
State your needs, be aware of bids for connection and turn towards them. The small moments of everyday life are actually the building blocks of relationship.
The Positive Perspective
The presence of a positive approach to problem-solving and the success of repair attempts.
Manage Conflict
We say “manage” conflict rather than “resolve” conflict, because relationship conflict is natural and has functional, positive aspects. Understand that there is a critical difference in handling perpetual problems and solvable problems.
Make Life Dreams Come True
Create an atmosphere that encourages each person to talk honestly about his or her hopes, values, convictions and aspirations.
Create Shared Meaning
Understand important visions, narratives, myths, and metaphors about your relationship.